2:40 in the morning

I feel stupid, I feel like someone out of some stupid movie who was left, I mean it is 2 something in the morning and I am eating chocolate and watching "Zack and Miri Make a Porno" for about the hundreths time, because it just reminds me off you and it reminds me of when we watched the movie, although we never really finished watching it. I just miss you soo much, it's sooo hard for me to move on, for you everything seems so easy, as if you didn't care anymore, but for me it is one of the hardest things I have ever done. Yes, I tried to move on, and I did stupid things to try it, I thought if I party a lot I will get distracted and move on, but it just made it worse, then I tried to talk to as many people as possible, to see if it will help me forget you, but it just showed me how lonely I actually am. I never wanted this to happen, I want you back, but I can't change your feelings towards me anymore, I wish I could, I know I would probably do anything for it to happen. Because you were my everything and in some kind of weird way you still are. I am sorry when I say mean, stupid things to you, that I know will offend you in some way, but I don't know why I am doing it, everything is just too much and I just can't take it anymore. I just can't believe that you could hurt me in such a way, although you always promised you never will. And that's what hurt's the most, you breaking your promise, and that's probably why I say those stupid things, I'm sorry I just never felt so left alone, humiliated, disappointed and sad, in some way you have to understand me or atleast try, because I am trying the same, although it's the hardest I have ever attempted to do.